As told by Alissa’s cat (aka, Monsterbait), to Valthrum’s familiar (Crafty the Homonculus)
People are weird. I mean, my master is ok, but the rest of that bunch are just strange.
Yesterday they stumbled into the Underdark.
What? No way!
No really, the Underdark, no more than 5 miles from here! Seriously!
And then they sent me out in a rickety old boat, across a ginormous lake filled with black water. No, seriously. They put me in this boat that’s at least 500 years past it’s due date, tied a rope to it, and shoved me into the lake. And, of course, while I was out there, all alone in the dark, they were attacked by bats or something, and they forgot about me, and these big lobsters with tentacles ripped the boat apart and tried to eat me. Icky looking things.
So today, we go back to the same place, and they use some fancy magic ritual to walk across the water.
Oh, yeah, Valthrum had me fetch that one for him last night, Water Walk. I wondered what that was for.
And, of course, the big lobsters with tentacles attack them. That was kind of exciting for a bit but I just hid in Alissa’s pocket while this was going on, cause no one thought to put one of these spells on me, of course.
Yeah, tell me about it, Valthrum forgets I even exist except when he needs one more hand to hold something, or help with some ritual, or go find some scroll he’s misplaced, or get him a drink, or something.
So, yeah, anyways, they found this HUGE stone door, with a bunch of funky writing on it. And statues of dragons and stuff all around it. I’m pretty sure some of them were supposed to be Tiamat.
ooooh, really…you don’t say…
Yeah, and they tried to open the door, and that was kind of funny. I think the monk almost ruptured something trying to force it open. And then the thiefy types tried to use their little picks on it. As if! It was obviously magically locked. I mean, seriously, what self respecting arcanist is going to lock a door with magic that could be picked by a thief?
snort yeah, I wish I could have watched that
So then, after making some copies of the writing and etchings of some of the artwork, they threw their water walk ritual again, and headed off across the water. They were about halfway back across when the Drow spotted something back by the door. She said something about “icky goblins”, or something like that…maybe it was “corrupted”. Anyhooo, I honestly thought she was going to go back and try to kill them and then get stuck on the wrong side of the water. Seriously, as often as that Drow gets into trouble like that, I really thought she was going to charge the goblins…but the rest of them talked her down, and then they just came back here.
Well, at least you get to travel around. I haven’t been outside the gates of this village in over 30 years. Heck, I don’t think I’ve been farther than the Temple or the Tavern in at least 10 years.
Ooh, yeah, that must get kinda boring. But you’ve all those cool books and scrolls to look at though…?
Yeah, that’s kinda neat I guess. Just wish he’d get some new ones. I’ve read all of these at least a dozen times each.
Well, we did bring back a copy of that funky writing on the door. And I think we’re supposed to be bringing something back from that stormy mountain place for Valthrum. Maybe we’ll find something cool for you to read there too.
oooh, yeah, that would be nice. When you leaving?
Tomorrow I think, right after the people go talk to someone at the market…